You Don't Want Me With A Gun
"You don't win them [purple hearts]. You get them when you get hit. So, in other words: I'd rather not have it." -- Lee Marvin
I see you comin' at me
Eyes all buzzin' at the end of each working day.
With those magazines all stashed up in your drawer
About protecting the U.S.A.
But you know, some of that talk just ain't my thing.
So, go on off and have your fun.
I will tell straight up:
You don't want me with a gun.
I know I come across as slick, cool dude.
With an easy-going smile.
As I teeter inside between calm and crude
Putting every mini-thought on file.
And I still indulge in those simple things
Even a burger on a bun.
But to put that Bambi there,
You don't want me with a gun.
Oh yes, I hear you when you say there is no end
As they're rolling out another tax.
And with a flick of a switch of C.N.N.,
I'm like a Seeger with an axe.
Check Snopes for facts.
My mom and dad enrolled me in Saint Andrews
To get me on that righteous path.
And while I scored a few letters there in track and field,
I just couldn't get a grip on math.
But between Father McMahon up my can
And the steel edge of a nun,.
You might say I aced that course.
You don't want me with a gun.
So, how is that for a little T.M.I.?
Other than that, I'm a regular guy.
Come on, Rambo.
Don't it make you want to cry?
You can try..
These days it's best to stay clear from big ideas.
That make you feel ten feet tall.
Because once that dog whistle hits our ears,
You know we won't be fetchin' ball.
Down we fall.
I even try to be progessive.
(Passive-aggressive)
Because it's all about being nice.
I walked my daughter down the aisle for her lesbo wedding
And voted for that black guy twice.
But still it's the same old back-and-forth
With nothing ever getting done.
Next time, I will abstain.
There's T.H.C. for pain.
I'll be too blitzed to aim.
You don't want me with a gun.
©2021
